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Episode 24: Jumping or Flying fish?

June 29th, 2012, 11:00 am

Average Rating: 5.00
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Author's Comments:

Reply zignoff, May 11th, 2012, 12:11 pm

Alrighty a reference to an awesome monster movie before a review of a crappy monster game... As promised, a review for the newly release PROTOTYPE 2. For warning purposes, I will tell you know, as ALL REVIEWS, THE SAME AS PROFESSIONAL REVIEWS FROM GAME MAGAZINES! Got it? Understand? So why does my opinion matter, it DOESN'T, the only one that matters is yours. HOWEVER, Let's not also forget that reviews are all biased, so just because they give some a 9.5 + doesn't mean that game truly is worth that score, and if they give a game 4-5 review doesn't mean it is remotely bad. Don't forget that we already know from many news reports out there that professionals are paid off for good reviews most of the time, it has been proven before, people have lost their job because of it.

So with THAT out of the way, if I review something you think is the BEST THING EVER, I don't care :P, it's MY opinion, I will TRY to point out as many reasons WHY I think this, but if you still want to argue with it, well... I don't really give a deformed donkey turd about it, ok?


PROTOTYPE 2! A sequel to a truly amazing and mindlessly fun game, a game meant for nothing more, but it's gory rampaging beat'm up and hack and slash sandbox mayhem, a complete game surprisingly it didn't have ANY DLC, which means what we got feels complete, and not nickeled and dime for more money.!

So let's start off with... what the HELL went wrong with this game?

Prototype 2 had the knowledge that they fixed and addressed many of the things people complained about in the first game, making side quest seem more important, taking away all the tedious repeatition of the quest, making powers seem more POWERFUL. Making the world seem more real and better looking, even showing items of the ability to destroy environments!

Yea, sadly that cake was a big ol LIE!

Prototype 2 is in so many ways a step down from it's previous world it's not even funny. I can't believe I traded in Batman AC, Dark Souls, and Red Dead Redemption for this pile of garbage.

Let's start off with the few things that don't really matter to me, as before I stated Graphics are pointless to me of the game sucks, in fact they are the LAST thing that matters to me, they literally add nothing to a game in my thoughts, they are a nice bonus. Seriously people can argue they bring you into the world and make you a part of it, you know what if you have no imagination maybe, but games have been bringing the world to life well before graphics became what they are, Words could be a powerful element in this.

Graphics: To me, they look great, but again I don't really care, but JUST because I don't care doesn't mean I won't say they aren't good or not, if they accomplish their goal, they don't have to be high definition to do it, they don't need to see peoples SKIN CELLS to prove they are good. P2 graphics are nice, the building have great textures, the humans looks like normal people, the skin is realistic. Characters and things shine during and after it rains, for what all is happening in the game, they do the job without a single skip, pause or frame drop.

Audio: Basic screams, crashes, explosions, and gory gut ripping sounds, sound clean and I don't see anything really wrong with them they sound right. Moving on to the voices and acting, Overall the Voices are good, each voice matches the person and sounds like a voice they would have, most do a good job in there roles, and don't sound like a group of funimations barnyard DBZ rejects. The character cussing is bad, but I have seen FAR worse.

Story: Ok I try to stop as many spoilers as I can, but I can't stop ALL of them so for your warning, possible spoilers ahead, your James Heller soldier with a family, another outbreak has appeared a year or so after the first one, sadly in the same place were James Family is, he is away on a mission at the time so, when he finally gets there things are bad, he finds his wife dead, but his daughter WELL here is the thing, it makes you believe their dead, James talks about finding both them dead and Alex Mercer the Dark hero from the first game being the cause. Problem is about near end of the game SURPRISE!, his daughter is alive, and she was just missing, HUH, why didn't he mention that, don't you think a father who didn't find his daughters dead body would be focusing on that, and no giving up so Early?!

Along with that bundle of character development problems, comes ALEX Mercer, dark hero who even having his girl friend/fiance betray him, his sister shun him after saving her, STILL stop the evil EVE green, and monster military from nuking the town and saving many lives, even at the cost of his own, even though he DID survive he was a person who did the right thing with no gain anymore to himself. SURPRISE, he is now an extremely pedobear DOUCHE who wants to end the world, and is the cause of everything, even though he makes you believe the military did it, which isn't completely a lie, but it was him. Why has his character changed SO MUCH, that in all honesty I thought it was somebody who was make believing to be him, framing him and that the REAL alex mercer would come in save the day and join James Heller in a co-op beat down!

Sadly no, the thing is THIS is Alex, the reason being is that most don't know why is, because the series had a comic that it didn't bother to RECAP AT ALL, it appears during the year or so between games he went around the world to FIND HIMSELF, and to see if the world was fit to continue, after a VERY few and crappy people later Alex decides humanity is hopeless, and that he must bring about a new world. ALA, hello I'm now a bad Final Fantasy emo villain who will change the world for the better...

So yea, the story is bad, full of various plot issues, and the ending is just stupid. All in all, not what most of us hoped for.


Gameplay: Ok here it is, lastly, the final part of the game and to me the most important, save the best for last RIGHT?! Sadly... No, problem is that Prototype 2 will WOW you for the first couple of hours,... then you beat it... no really, the game can not only be BEATEN in one sitting, it can 1000/1000=Platinumed in one playthrough in 8-10 hours TOPS, that's getting EVERYTHING, all the side quest, all the collectibles, max level, ON HARD.

So you are not saying, "well JUST because you got everything doesn't take away the replay value, god what's with gamers now adays, we used to not complain about this in OLD days, NEW age gamers are so pathetic!"

First off, shut up before you spout crap you have no idea about, I am 30 years old, I have play games since before a number of you were born I bet. It's EXACTLY because those were old games we didn't have high standards for them, limited tech and a beginning to a new media it was just awesome to play them to begin with, but this is 3 decades later, games aren't getting cheaper, and systems are getting more expensive, we should be getting all the bang for our buck we use to, game should have insane amounts of content, loads of replay value, etc, etc....

IF they don't they should not cost full price, if they don't feel full price. So let me explain, the only saving grace is the mayhem the game and mindless fun to be had, the problem is Prototype 2 isn't just short, it's mechanics are stream-lined to the point they are even less in depth then a dynasty warriors game, which I love DW games so I should know. I can get easily 300+ hours of mindless awesome fun a piece for 50-60 bucks from them, when I can barely get 8 hours form a games I tend to frown.

Prototype 2 reduced a majority of the powers moves, downright removing a number of them, to get this, NOW to be sold as pre-order exclusives, and DLC later on. So think about that, many moves or skills including the ARMOR skill, which was in the game have been removed to be sold back to us, this game is almost a complete clone of the first game, TONS of the animations are the same from the first game, 3 or 4 new skills doesn't not make it new and exciting!

You can know have 2 powers at once, but the problem is the combos are so limited know that they don't really matter, moves no have 3 hit combo's 5 actually, BUT hits 1 and 2 and the same hits 3 and 4 in the combo, so the only way to change it is to alternate between the powers which are map to Square and triangle, or X and Y, and each move has a charge attack... THAT is it, that is the limit of their overall depth, some have a couple of hidden skills, but they are just stream-lined or reduced version of the moves form Prototype.

Let's go into the LAST part, RADNET, seemed like a good idea, but sadly, it's just crap, for those first few additions you get access to special challenges which if you complete a full set you get rewards, sounds fun? They are, problem is, they are basically the challenges that were in P1, removed to be sold back, which means that other then the collectibles find the black boxes, hunt a bio team, side quest ( go race, or kill/absorb a target), and main story (Sneak into a place multiple times, and ALSO kills and absorb something), there is literally NOTHING to do, and here is the OTHER problem, they are timed release, which means to get ALL the challenges and content, you have 2 wait 2 months to get it. Most will be done with the game by the SECOND DAY after it's release, one of the first rewards is a skill that increases experience gained by 25%, again let me point out, you can max your level in less then a sitting of play, and it takes a week at least to wait to get this skill... poor planning.

Final Conclusion: Prototype 2 Score: 5/10, Just rent it people... it had a lot to offer for it, but got capcom fever, removed gameplay components, and to sell later to extend the gameplay, which they did poorly. People will say, but you missing the point, the point is to have mindless gory fun mayhem, not at all, I understand that, problem is, I can do that in other games.. BETTER games for less then 10 bucks if that was what was TRULY important to me, but it wasn't my only reason for playing. This game was stated to put the power of a GOD n my hands, NOT even close, MINECRAFT gave me more godly powers then this...


"Super Mario Brothers is a Registered Trademark of Nintendo, all rights are reserved to them for using their characters likeness."

Reply zignoff, July 1st, 2012, 10:52 am

They do look similar huh? @qazox: That fish is supposed to be the old Mario flying fish of course, but they do have somewhat similar designs don't they?

Reply zignoff, July 7th, 2012, 4:10 pm

Yea, it is possible. @qazox: Anyway I hope you enjoy what you see so far.

Just try to handle my poor grammar :)

User's Comments:

Reply qazox, June 30th, 2012, 7:03 pm

OMG1 Beans put Magikarp into SMB!!! :p

Reply qazox, July 3rd, 2012, 10:11 pm

@zignoff: I know.. but it still loks like a magikarp. I think one of people who put those into the game made magikarp look like them as an homage.

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